


Closer

by Cirkne



Category: Deadpool - All Media Types, Spider-Man - All Media Types
Genre: First Kiss, Fluff, Getting Together, M/M, Tiny bit of Angst, i refuse to write spiderman as spider-man, i used the word insane a few times so if that bugs u kno, suicide but no death bc its wade
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-08
Updated: 2016-03-08
Packaged: 2018-05-25 13:32:43
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,867
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6196951
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cirkne/pseuds/Cirkne
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“Hey,” Hallucination Spiderman says, before stumbling to move out of his way when Wade passes him to get to the kitchen. “I-” His Spiderman starts, “I came to apologize. For earlier.”</p><p>Wade deals with hallucinations.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Closer

**Author's Note:**

> In which I didn't expect to relate to Deadpool as much as I do

When Wade opens the door to his rundown apartment, Spiderman is leaning on his coffee table. He looks at him for a moment, then sighs. Usually this Spiderman - his Spiderman that his mind has made up just for him - shows up a few hours after he’s been alone. He figures it fits, though, since it hasn’t been his best day and he got into a fight with the real Spiderman. Not a physical fight, which Wade can handle and more often than not encourages. No. They fought with words which, in his opinion, is the worst way to fight. Ever.

“Hey,” Hallucination Spiderman says, before stumbling to move out of his way when Wade passes him to get to the kitchen. “I-” His Spiderman starts, “I came to apologize. For earlier.”

Wade snorts, because this is typical, because even when he’s hallucinating Spiderman is still a goody two shoes. He opens the door to the fridge to find it pretty much empty. He doesn’t want to go out to get food and he’s not exactly in the mood to have another delivery guy gawk at him and ask if he’s ‘Spiderman’s sidekick’, so he decides to not eat. It’s not like he can starve; he can, but it won’t do any real damage anyway.

“Are you ignoring me?” Hallucination Spiderman asks, hovering by the entrance to the kitchen, and Wade runs a hand down his face. He had managed to tune him out for a moment and his outfit looks even more annoying than usual in how it screams _look at me_. “I didn’t mean to hurt your feelings, really,” He tries again, and Wade closes his eyes. The fact that the Spiderman he can make do anything chooses to apologize to him would be funny if it wasn’t so pathetic.

He slams the door to the fridge closed and walks to the living room, making Hallucination Spiderman stumble back once again. This is what his minds does, Wade knows. It creates an illusion of it being real, makes Hallucination Spiderman avoid touching him because you cannot fake a touch.

Wade walks to his couch, slumps down on it and moves to remove his mask, before he looks up at the reflection of himself in the black of his TV and stops, dropping his hand. He doesn’t exactly want to see the scars, not right now. Being Deadpool is easier than being Wade.

Hallucination Spiderman stays standing, shifting uncomfortably from one leg to the other. They had gotten into a fight because Wade insisted on knowing his identity and it wasn’t anything more than his usual teasing but today Spiderman wasn’t having any of it. It ended with him very angrily telling Wade that the only reason he didn’t care was because he didn’t have anyone to protect. Wade had left before he could tell Spiderman that it wasn’t him that didn’t care, it was everyone else, and it’s kind of pointless to try and keep your identity a secret when no one minds calling you your real name.

“You can’t ignore me forever,” Hallucination Spiderman says and Wade reaches for the remote. He doesn’t need to. Just until he’s around the real Spiderman again. There’s no need for a substitute when he’s talking to the real thing. Wade turns on the TV and leaves it on the channel currently playing commercials. Hallucination Spiderman stays quiet for a little bit and Wade leans his head back, letting out a sigh. His body isn’t hurting more than usual and he hasn’t had to heal himself yet today but he feels drained, exhausted.

“Buy one, get one free,” A voice chirrups on TV.

“That’s kind of like us,” Hallucination Spiderman comments and then, quieter, adds; “At least, you know, that’s what we should be. We work great as a team and I-” He sighs. Wade can hear Hallucination Spiderman moving around. He really doesn’t want to have to listen to this. “I’m sorry I said you don’t have anyone because you do. You have me, Wade.”

Wade grabs at his gun. He hates this pathetic need for validation from someone who doesn’t actually like him. They work together, sure. On the extremely good days Wade might even think of them as friends before his boxes remind him that Spiderman doesn’t think the same. He doesn’t, in any way, _have_ Spiderman.

Hallucination Spiderman takes a step back once Wade points his gun at him and Wade might consider shooting him except that it won’t do anything. When he moves the gun to his head, Hallucination Spiderman jumps to him.

“No,” he says loudly, Wade’s mind desperate to keep this illusion alive and then a bullet goes through his head.

When he comes to, Wade’s shivering but Hallucination Spiderman is gone and that’s good, it should be good. Until he shows up again, Wade can almost be considered sane. Except that it doesn’t make him feel better. It just makes him feel lonely.

***

Hallucination Spiderman shows up again in the morning. Wade notices him in the back of his eye when he’s walking to the bathroom. Hallucination Spiderman doesn’t jump to annoy him in the bathroom and when Wade emerges, he’s still sitting on the couch.

“How are you feeling?” Hallucination Spiderman asks, almost carefully and looks in front of himself, not turning to look at Wade. Which is good, he assumes. He’s only wearing his boxers and he doesn’t have the energy to come up with Spiderman’s reaction to his skin not being hidden by anything.

Wade putts the kettle on and goes to his room to get dressed which he doesn’t exactly have a reason to do but it makes him feel like there’s something he can handle so he does it anyway. Hallucination Spiderman stays sitting on the couch like the good boy he is.

He doesn’t bother with his suit because he doesn’t plan to leave his apartment and as much as Wade likes being covered up, all that spandex makes his scars itch.

When he comes back to the living room, Spiderman has taken his mask off and this is… new. He knows, because weird facts seem to stick in his brain, that the human mind isn’t capable of making up an entirely new face and every face they ever imagine has parts of other faces they’ve seen. Wade wonders where he’s seen those eyes, looking at him in this vulnerable, earnest way and why he decided to make Spiderman so young. He knows real Spiderman is in college but Hallucination Spiderman looks like he’s barely out of high school.

Wade blinks at him, blinks away the hope he imagines in Hallucination Spiderman’s eyes as they’re looking at each other and walks to the kitchen.

“My name’s Peter,” Hallucination Spiderman calls after him in a rushed voice. “Peter Parker. I live with my aunt May and I work for the daily bugle. I get payed to take pictures of myself as Spiderman which is totally narcissistic but a boy needs to eat.”

Wade scoffs in the kitchen. He’s not surprised by his mind putting Peter Parker, Spiderman’s personal photographer, as Spiderman himself. He’s a little surprised at the aunt part but that probably means Hallucination Spiderman is an orphan which is a typical superhero backstory.

Wade makes his coffee and then pulls out a cup for Hallucination Spiderman because he’s a good host even to his imagination. Hallucination Spiderman is blabbering something about trust and friendship. Wade prides himself in being able to tune him out.

When he sits down at the opposite side of the couch and rests a coffee mug in front of Hallucination Spiderman, there’s a beat of complete silence. He’s managed to make his illusion stunned, which is most likely kind of impressive. If only there was a mentally fucked up club where Wade could brag about this without being offered medication or a trip to a mental hospital.

“Does this mean you forgive me?” Hallucination Spiderman asks and then lifts his mug. Wade whips his head to look at where the mug should have stayed on the table because it was real, because Wade had held it in his hand and Hallucination Spiderman should not be able to. He turns to look at the face of a teenaged-looking Spiderman. Wade could not have made up a face like this. A face with no imperfections and yet not at all perfect.

“You’re real,” Are the first words he says, and swallows. Spiderman- _Peter_ sets down his coffee and frowns at Wade’s face before he seems to realize that all those times Wade joked about being insane weren’t jokes.

“You thought-” Peter starts and then stops, frowning a little more. “Is that why you-” He shakes his head then, then looks up at Wade, at where Wade’s face isn’t covered by a mask, at where he isn’t Deadpool but instead himself. Wade sinks into his place on the couch and hangs his head, closing his eyes. _Spiderman_ wasn’t supposed to see him kill himself. _Spiderman_ wasn’t supposed to see him be his pathetic self instead of loud and obnoxious Deadpool.

“I’m real,” Peter says finally, his voice almost a whisper as he moves closer to Wade. “And I was real yesterday, when I said that I was sorry and that you had me, because I am, and you do.”

Wade flinches away before Peter even reaches out to touch him. Peter moves back but doesn’t leave. Doesn’t say anything.

“Does it happen a lot?” Peter asks when their coffee has already gone cold on the table. Wade clenches his jaw and then nods, quickly, as if hoping Peter won’t notice it. “Why?” he asks next, but it doesn’t sound angry, or disgusted, or filled with pity, which are all reactions Wade expected. He thinks this is what makes Peter real.

Wade doesn’t answer for a very long time and Peter might have given up on waiting for a response when, finally, lifts his head and says:

“You make me feel less lonely and, ironically, less insane.”

Peter nods and moves closer again.

“Can I touch you?” he asks, already reaching for Wade’s hand but still waiting for an answer. Wade nods and his breath hitches at Peter’s soft skin against his scars. Peter doesn’t seem to react, doesn’t move his hand away. It’s been so long since someone touched him like this. Like he doesn’t need to be afraid they will hurt him.

Then, Peter’s hand is on his cheek and he’s leaning in until he’s kissing Wade and Wade is kissing back without really thinking about it, without trying to push Peter away because this is something he needs, has needed for longer than he can remember. Later he will ask Peter what it’s like to kiss someone that looks like him and if his scars gross him out but for now he just leans into it like it’s all he knows.

“This is real,” Peter says when they pull away, his hands still cupping Wade’s face, like he knows Wade needs to be reminded. Wade nods and moves in for another kiss. Nothing he’s made up could ever feel this good.


End file.
